Bartender 18 Salty Dogs and a Heineken…No…For Each of Us

You read that correctly….What was to follow is now a blur!!!!

Four Marines enter a bar in Okinawa, Japan. One walks up to the bar and orders 18 Salty Dogs and a Heineken…that’s 72 Salty Dogs and 4 Heineken… no joke. If you are scratching your head as to what a Salty Dog is…think Screwdriver with Grapefruit Juice instead of OJ then salt the rim.

The plan was to slam the Salty Dogs and then drink the Heineken then move onto the next bar. This blog could easily end right here…I remember bits and pieces from the evening…I think. What I remember could easily be from any night within in that year that ended similarly. The following is a list that may or may not have happened that night but did happen at sometime during my year in Japan (Okinawa);

Me and Franz singing Karaoke while wearing only a Fundoshi (Japanese underwear) (look it up)

Waking up in a Japanese house with little kids staring at us

Driving down the street and arguing about which side of the road we should be on

Thinking it strange wondering as to who’s car we were driving since we didn’t own one

Vomiting on the Honcho (Marine for Japanese taxi driver) while trying to pay him

Translating Franz’s T-shirt that had an atomic bomb mushroom cloud with the words Atomic Bomb made in America tested in Japan to a group of Japanese men (it didn’t go over well )

Eating a Pizza Dog from the Jap -In-The-Box (concession stand outside our barracks run by a really nice Japanese family)

Placing peanut butter on a napkin then stuffing it into roommates boot

Dropping garbage bags of empty beer bottles and cans off the 4th floor into the dumpster as people walked by

Vomiting under the table at the Enlisted Club causing two others to do the same

Getting up from the previous table to move to a cleaner one then laughing as new people sit down

Walking into a restaurant, ordering/and getting dinner and drinks only to find out we’re at a wedding reception

Driving my Amtrac (personnel carrier..the size of a tank) down a tree-lined trail…turning around and taking out a dozen trees. Then reading a sign that says 750,000 yen ($5,000) fine for destroying trees (per tree)

Realizing I just cost the tax payers $60,000…..priceless

Realizing that I am an ambassador while in a foreign country and my actions represent the United States of America….thinking they should have done a better job of screening at the recruitment center

I know I’m getting lazy….then again, I am not literary genius. I’ll come up with something better for Monday. This is what you get when you show up at the Depot at 11:00 and Ed gives you a Mexican Standoff….don’t ask…I would soon learn that the stand-off would be whether I could stop from vomiting afterward! Good Bye until next time

Happy Drink de Mayo!


By Tim

One comment on “Bartender 18 Salty Dogs and a Heineken…No…For Each of Us

  1. Pingback: Take A Bullet For The President And Get Your Hooker Too! « Thoughts From The Tragically Flawed Mind Of Tim

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